It’s hard to come back to the ole work life after the long Memorial Day Weekend. It was such a spectacular weekend – getting time to workout, spending time with friends and being outside for much of it. It was one of those weekends that was perfect in it’s simplicity. I spent time with kind, fun people including my own family. I got to appreciate the feeling a great workout gave me, got in some napping and the weather was perfect. Kumbaya!
This summer I am going to start to tackle one of my biggest challenges – decluttering and tidying up my house. I am going to start with my own closet and clothing situation. It’s a trait I come by honestly by way of my Mom and it’s one that drives me crazy. I read this article the other day:
“It’s not just about tidying up to get rid of things,” Ramsey says. “It’s about having gratitude for the objects you choose to be in your life.” So if something (or someone) doesn’t bring you joy, don’t try to justify its place in your world. Just say thank you and move on.
One of the points made is that you should try to get it done in one project. So not by room or bit by bit. You need to sit down and go through all of your clothes at once. I am going to organize my clothes and closet by the end of the summer because it’s starting to drain me of energy. Seeing the big piles of clothes all over my bedroom isn’t healthy and I can’t find any of the pieces that bring me joy and that goes against the principle of having the clothes I do.
Believe, when you are most unhappy, that there is something for you to do in the world… Helen Keller
I’ve been doing some more soul searching the past week –
The past few days have been pretty stressful. Scott’s mom is in the hospital. My dad and step mother got into a car accident this past weekend. Their car is totaled, they are banged up but going to be OK. The thing is, experiencing your parents’ getting older is tough especially when they didn’t take particularly great care of their health in general. It’s another reminder that lifestyle definitely catches up with you as you age. And when you are experiencing it from a distance – it’s hard to really see how bad a situation is. You have to rely on your parents to tell you what’s going on. Reality is different depending on the filters we put on.
In other stressful news, Scott and I are both not feeling well with different maladies. Nothing too serious but enough that we both went to the doctors last week and are on meds. And to top it all off – Scott’s car broke down on Friday evening and a bunch of money $$$ later, the car should be fixed by tomorrow.
All of this has me thinking about what I really want out of life and why am I not feeling as happy as I think I should be?
Career wise: Do I want to continue heading into an office and working for someone else? The culture and company I am looking for based on my experience with my last position is a lot more clear than it has ever been. The issue is, I’m not sure my current situation is meeting the requirements as I had hoped it would. In the past 90 days of me starting, there have been a ton of changes and restructuring. Things I didn’t know about when I accepted the position. The changes aren’t really in line with my background, interests or what I was looking for. It’s disappointing to say the least. I was hoping to be able to grow, learn, be challenged and thrive in this environment. At this point, it’s not really looking like many of those opportunities exist. Never say never, of course, but having learned my lesson at my previous job, I realize that if it doesn’t feel right, I need to explore options.
I am stressed out and feeling a bit lost. Life sure doesn’t stop for you to catch your breath…
- 7 Weird Reasons Your Back Hurts
- TED: Depression: The Secret We Share
- Are Super Athletes the Secret to Health?
- A 2-Minute Walk May Counter the Harms of Sitting
I came across 23 BRILLIANT LIFE LESSONS FROM ANTHONY BOURDAIN and thought so many of them were worthwhile. I especially liked this one…
“If you’re twenty-two, physically fit, hungry to learn and be better, I urge you to travel – as far and as widely as possible. Sleep on floors if you have to. Find out how other people live and eat and cook. Learn from them – wherever you go.”
I think this one resonated with me because it’s the advice I would give my younger self. When I was in my twenties, I was so gripped with fear of instability that it caused me to see things in very rigid terms. The person I am today realizes clearly that that fear held me back from so many adventures and experiences. They are the things I look back at and wish I had just jumped into the opportunities that presented themselves during that time. I guess that’s the beauty of hindsight though. I know it’s never too late to jump in and go for it but there are adult life responsibilities that have to be considered that prevent me from just dropping everything and going for it now. What I can do is take chances and travel when opportunities exist and encourage my kiddos to not be controlled by fear as they grow up and taken on the world. They can learn from the lessons I experienced…
This doesn’t just apply to travel either. How many things in our lives do we avoid or quit because we are scared? Scared of what’s on the other side. Afraid of change. Afraid of the unknown. I’m not sure who wrote the following “Reality of Fear”, but it definitely gives you some points to consider as you start to confront fear holding you back…
REALITY OF FEAR:
You’re not scared of the dark;
you’re scared of what’s in it.
You’re not afraid of heights;
you’re afraid of falling.
You’re not afraid of the people around you;
you’re afraid of rejection.
You’re not afraid to love;
you’re just afraid of not being loved back.
You’re not afraid to let go;
you’re just afraid of accept the fact it’s gone.
You’re not afraid to try again;
you’re just afraid of getting hurt for the same reason.
May is Mental Health Awareness Month. Did you know that about 42.5 million American adults (or 18.2 percent of the total adult population in the United States) suffer from some mental illness, enduring conditions such as depression, bipolar disorder or schizophrenia?
I’m sharing the stories in the links below because they got me thinking about how easy it is to look at someone’s life and assume everything is perfect. With social media, people’s lives look idyllic . All smiles and photo filters. If you took it all at face value, you would think that everyone has it good and living the life. But you know what? The reality is that we all have struggles and our stories. You never do know what is going on behind the filtered pictures on Instagram or the stories shared on Facebook.
Life today is busy. People are more stressed out and pushed and pulled in a bunch of different directions. Our bodies aren’t designed to handle this type of constant stress. Add in that some people have the type of personality that can’t handle things being undone. They can’t live with things being less than perfect. Many people who suffer from depression or anxiety are these type A personalities.
- Some Practical Thoughts on Suicide
Tim Ferris talks about suicide, and why I’m still on this planet.
- Penn Runner’s Depression Masked on Social Media
On Instagram, Madison Holleran’s life looked ideal: athlete at the University of Pennsylvania, bright student, beloved friend. But the photos hid the reality of someone struggling to go on:
Trust your instinct
The point of this post is to remind people out there that not everything is what it seems. No one’s life is perfect. If you feel like something is not right with a family member, friend or acquaintance – ASK. And if they say Nothing – ASK Again and again and again.
Me, a recent University of Arizona grad starting a new job – scared and excited about the opportunities that lie ahead.
You, an Arizona native, who had started a few months earlier thanks to your Pops, who left an application on the shop’s chain link fence.
We had both been on our own for many years – navigating our twenties without any sort of plan or guidance.
Ryan introduced us – in the break room. I remember the warmth you gave off when you smiled. I remember feeling attraction, giddiness, and curiosity.
Our first date Feb 4, 1995– Chinese food, then dancing and drinks. We found out about each other. I can’t remember a time after that where I didn’t feel special around you.
You ‘got’ me. I ‘got’ you. Our life began to flow.
We moved to VA. Got married in Vegas. Bought the house. Adopted Scully, the dog.
Three years into our marriage, we found out we were having a baby. Neither of us had been around babies growing up. Shocked by the news, we had no idea what to expect. Our family and friends were supportive and excited for us. It was such a fun and happy time.
Hannah Bea came into this world right on her due date. Our lives would never be the same. We became parents. Two years and one month later, Nathaniel Ryan was born. A girl, a boy; our family was complete.
We became increasingly busy and had more demands put on us. Family, work, and life responsibilities constantly colliding – we began to lose track of time and failed to appreciate how preciously short life can be.
We got a big wake-up call, didn’t we? Cancer reared its ugly head. We quickly shifted the gears of life and put all of our power and energy into getting you well. As with most challenges you have faced, you stepped up with determination, humor and quiet strength. It wasn’t easy, but you did it. Cancer Free.
Our life began to flow again. A bit different than before the big ‘C’, of course, but strong and steady all the same. We moved forward with the gift of perspective.
Today, far from perfect, we are happy. We have a sincere affection for each other, rooted in love, laughter and security. There is no one else in this world I trust more or who makes me feel more at home than you.
Twenty years ago today, a wonderful adventure began…
Today marks my third week at my new gig and although I am still very green with knowledge, I’m feeling at home. There is a ton of work to be done and I have the opportunity to make a real difference to the company. I was thinking this weekend, that I feel better. I’m starting to re-engage with some things that were losing my interest which to me is a sign of things getting set straight in my life.
Now for the brutal honesty – my focus on eating has gone way off the deep end. I can’t really even say I am following paleo at this point. I’m kinda all over the place. I know what I need to do but finding the drive to do it has been tough the past few months. I’m not going to lie either – it has affected my waist line too. I will need to really stop and listen to figure out what’s really going on with me. Why am I ignoring what I know I need to do? It’s not that the food is so delicious that I can’t control myself –it’s not about the food.
- Saturday: CrossFIt
- Sunday: Boxing
One more thought to share from the Golden Globes – Maggie Gyllenhaal talked about complicated women and how we are all complicated when it comes down to it. I love that way of putting it – complicated does not have to be negative. I am proud to be complicated – to me it means being interesting, smart, engaging, emotional, passionate, funny, compassionate, and strong. And I would rather be that any day of the week than easy. And Hats off to men who love complicated women!
“When I look around the room at the women who are in here and I think about the performances that I’ve watched this year, what I see actually are women who are sometimes powerful and sometimes not,” she said in her acceptance speech. “Sometimes sexy, sometimes not. Sometimes honorable, sometimes not. And what I think is new is the wealth of roles for actual women in television and in film.”
Today was my last day at XO. While my stay there was short, six months, I learned a lot and met some smart, sharp people. With that said -the role I had wasn’t a good fit for me. It was fine — but not challenging or engaging for me and I just don’t want to accept mediocre anymore. It’s time for me to jump into something new, challenging and fun. I have a few days off before I start on Monday. Here’s to new adventures – fear ain’t got nothing on me.
My sisters shared with me that each year they decide upon a mantra to carry them throughout the year. To motivate, guide and inspire them. A mantra differs from a resolution in that it’s word or short phrase that is repeated mentally, often used to aid in meditation. It can help set your intentions and re-focus so that you develop the habits and become the You you envision. Maybe you want to uncuff yourself from fear or be kinder. Whatever it is – choose it and refer to it often to help reset your thoughts.
It’s been a good thing for me to step back and really just breathe the past two weeks. I had some family in town, got to enjoy some unencumbered downtime, got my fitness on and just allowed myself to “BE’. There are some big changes in store for me this month that I will share in the next week or so –and I think they are all really good things!!
I have often mentioned how you need to step outside of your comfort zone to really make change happen. With the new year starting, I have started seeing a lot of talk about CHANGE. Change does not just happen though. You have to act, choose, and think differently. And that is where the danger zone is. It’s foreign and uncomfortable to do that. We are so many times driven by fear. What will happen if I do this or that? We fall into what Tony Blauer calls a “fear loop”. And it can paralyze us into inaction. When you feel the fear start to creep and start to take over, that’s when you need to step up and combat it. That takes practice and focus just like any other skill you want to hone. And that of course is also uncomfortable –so don’t fall into the loop of fear and stay in an unhappy, unhealthy situation. Let’s make 2015 OUR YEAR!
- Why Getting Uncomfortable is the Key to Personal Growth
- New Year’s Resolutions? Make a list, get it done
- 4 Simple Goal Setting Ideas For 2015
If you haven’t yet, head over to like my Facebook community page Live Fit and Sore! I’ve been sharing all sorts of news, information, resources and inspiration over there as well as on here. I figured there can’t be too many ways to try to support and inspire others to live a life of wellness…
Tonight is the eve of Christmas eve and the stores were crazy today which made me feel better about being so behind in my preparing. When I went to Costco yesterday to pick up my holiday cards, the guy that rang me up told me that I wasn’t alone and then gave me a high five just for getting it done. I liked that attitude…and it was much needed. This past week has been stressful – in addition to my car needing a lot of work ($$$), Scotty has come down with bronchitis which will no doubt actually turn out to be walking pneumonia as usual. His immune system wasn’t great to begin with and seemed to worsen after chemo. He’s on some meds and hopefully will be feeling much better tomorrow. We have some serious gift wrapping to do tomorrow evening —
Someone mentioned yesterday that they really get a lot out of the quotes and motivational stuff I post. That meant a lot to me because the truth is I post them for me –and figure I can’t be the only one needing positive words and inspiration to help me focus on how great life is. I have had a ton of ups and downs the past year or so – as so many others have had – and I find reading others’ experienced words helps.
I came across this quote this evening…
“If you realized how powerful your thoughts are, you would never think a negative thought.”
It’s easy to say, but much harder to actually practice – what we can do though, is learn to recognize negativity as it starts to creep into our thinking and purposely drive it out. Here are some other ideas to put into practice to help you up your game: How to Stay Positive: 11 Smart Habits. I know some of you out there don’t believe that there is power in positive thinking or that setting positive intentions each and every day can help make your life brighter – that’s OK. Some of the quotes & inspirational sayings are bullshit for sure– but the ones that speak to me, I share. We have a choice in how we see the world. Life is challenging enough, why not face the challenge with inspiration and purpose?
One Direction stops by the Tonight Show Music Room to perform “Santa Claus Is Coming To Town.”
Boxing 1hour 6A
I have always said I wouldn’t sugar coat my wellness journey – there are ups and downs. I seem to be in a valley right now…
I’m having a rough time as of late. I feel beaten up. I have just a sense of blah around most things in my life right now. I’ve been trying to sit back and reflect on it though. Could it be the mid-life crisis that people talk about?
I’m in my early 40’s, although closer to mid 40’s than I sometimes realize – I’ve been in the VA area since 1996. I’ve had ups and downs career wise. I’ve gotten married, had kids, and helped my husband battle a serious health issue. I live in a nice suburban area, own my home – my kids are fed, receiving a great education, have family that loves them. Same can be said about me – I have a great husband who is my biggest champion, my kids are amazing – so, why do I feel lonely and unfulfilled lately?
I feel unconnected and bored – not really feeling close to many people around me. I‘m having issues staying on point with my nutrition as well. I feel like a big blob and have been making excuses for eating crap.
I believe that in the idea “fake it until you make it“, surround yourself with positive people and words. Being down and being around a bunch of Debby Downer people and thoughts doesn’t do anything to help pull you out.